Its' Barren Perfection
by wynteralchemyst
Summary: "She was his weakness, and he couldn't deny her anything." Against a backdrop of bleak skies and forbidding mountains of crystal sand, Noel opens his heart to Serah. SPOILERS through A Dying World.


**Author's Note: This is a companion piece to my other Noel/Serah story, "Casino Dreams". Although it isn't necessary to understand what's going on without reading "Casino Dreams" first, I highly suggest taking a look at it. I do reference to it, and I don't want you guys to get lost.**

**Spoilers are up through the Dying World bit of the game.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Final Fantasy. Kinda wish I did. **

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><p>"So this is 700 AF," Serah said softly.<p>

Noel followed Serah's gaze and tried to see the world through her eyes. Crystal sand, the color of snow, filled the valley below them. Like reaching fingers, it clung to the base of teh basalt mountains that pressed their girth against the sky. A lone windmill slowly turned in the distance and dead trees, like old ghosts, spotted the landscape.

"Never thought the future would be this bleak, did you?" Noel asked.

"No, it's... it's beautiful," she murmured.

He turned to stare at her. "You think the end of the world is _pretty_?" He demanded incredulously.

"N-Not all of it!" Serah said hurriedly. She waved her hands in a frantic motion-something Noel had come to recognize as a sign of her distress. "I can see why you would hate it here. This landscape is... very lonely. And sad."

"But not all of it is," Noel stated firmly. Serah sometimes had a habit of evading his questions, but she wasn't going to get out of it this time.

"No," Serah said. She took a step closer to Noel and pointed. "See how the setting sun makes the sand glitter? And the clouds almost look silver."

A reluctant smile curved Noel's lips. Trust Serah to find things to admire in this wasteland. He leaned in close, trying to look where she had indicated. "Where?" He teased. "I don't see it."

"Oh, you!" Serah laughed in surprise and pushed him away. "I was being serious!"

"I know you were," he said lightly. "I just-well, I guess I have a harder time seeing it than you do." He shrugged. "Too many memories, I guess."

The smile vanished from Serah's face. "I'm sorry," she said. "I didn't mean to remind you-"

"It's not hard in this place." Noel sent Serah what he hoped was a comforting smile. But, since this was Serah he was talking to, Noel knew she wouldn't be able to let it go.

She pursed her lips, seeming to argue with herself for a moment. Then, just like Noel thought she would, she blurted, "but I didn't mean-"

"I know what you thought. And I'm not offended, promise."

The look on Serah's face was priceless. Noel laughed.

"It's like you've been reading my mind lately," Serah said, following close behind as Noel made his way down the hill. "How do you do that? Hang on-" She stumbled a few steps and caught up with him. "-am I _predictable_?"

He raised an eyebrow and glanced sidelong at her. "Nope, all the credit goes to my Hunter's Luck."

Serah grinned. "Oh, of course."

"Besides," Noel went on, "you shouldn't blame yourself all the time. None of this-us, here, I mean-is your fault. You weren't the one who tampered with the Historia Crux and you didn't ask the Goddess to mess with the timeline. If the future turns out to be horrible, even after all we've done, then it's not because of you, Serah. It isn't."

He had walked several feet ahead before she called his name.

"Noel."

He looked back at her, surprised with himself for not noticing how far she had fallen behind. "What is it?" He called, instincts taking over. "Is something wrong?"

Serah showed no inclination to move. "All you said was me," she said quietly.

"What?"

"You said that _I_ shouldn't blame myself," she said, raising her voice. "But what about you?"

Immediately he knew what she was getting at. Noel turned away. "I don't want to talk about this now."

"I do." She hurried to his side, kicking up small clouds of sand in her wake. "Noel, you should take your own advice-"

"And you can see how helpful that's been." Bitterness crept into his voice as he remembered the past he had recently re-enacted. "No thanks."

Serah stayed by his side as Noel abruptly began to walk. "I don't blame you for anything," she said, "and I'm sure Mog doesn't, either."

Noel glanced over Serah's shoulder. The only part of the moogle that was showing was the slight flicker of his bright jewel. "Right," he said. "That's comforting."

"You can't believe-" She broke off when a dark look flashed across his face. "You _do_. Noel, why are you blaming yourself?"

"I thought I said I don't want to talk about it."

"Wait, stop. Let's just stop a moment." Serah took Noel's hand in both of hers and pulled against him, forcing him to stop. "I don't see how you can be at fault-"

"Oh, I can. No matter what way you look at it, it's me." Noel looked away from Serah, unable to bear the hurt in her eyes.

"Why are you so negative?" She cried, frustration seeping into her voice.

"And why are _you_ being so optimistic?" He jerked his hand out of hers and strode a few feet away. "No matter what I do, something horrible happens. Sometimes I wonder if we even can change the future."

Noel expected Serah to back off, or even try to comfort him. Her next words were a surprise.

"A little while ago, you told me that you wished I would tell you when something's bothering me." Her voice was strong. "Well, I feel the same about you, Noel. Tell me your fears; I want to hear them."

Noel grunted, impressed despite himself. "You've changed."

Her voice was so gentle it nearly broke his heart. "I had a good teacher."

He let all his breath out in a resigned sigh. He couldn't win against Serah. She was his weakness, and he couldn't deny her anything. "I... am supposed to be a protector," he said slowly. "All my life, I thought my calling was to protect Yeul and be her guardian. Then Caius left... and Yeul died... and I wished for some way I could change it.

"Then I met you." His eyes flickered to Serah. "I became your protector. And the longer I traveled with you, the more the pain of Yeul's loss receded. I began to hope that... well, that my future wouldn't be so... alone."

Noel's voice cracked a little and his stomach churned in embarrassment. He didn't want to see Serah's face so he stared at his hands. "But you can see visions, just like Yeul. Serah, if you die, I don't think I can-"

"Noel." Her hands clasped his. She waited for Noel to look up at her, but he was staring at their hands. Her skin was pale against his and her fingers were small and fragile. Such opposites were so beautiful.

The words slipped out before he could stop them: "Sometimes I think it's me."

There was a brief silence, then she asked, "what?"

"Everyone in my village died. Yeul died. The Caius that I knew is as good as dead, and now you..." His voice shook and he struggled to keep himself in control.

"Noel?" She whispered.

"I'm starting to wonder if... I'm starting to wonder if I'm a..." Noel shut his eyes. "...a _curse_."

"No." Serah gripped his hands, hard. "_No_," she said fiercely. "Noel Kreiss, you are not a curse. Do you hear me? You are... you're..."

He waited as she struggled for words. Then he felt one of her hands brush against his cheek and her lips press tenderly against his.

Noel's eyes flew open. He was shocked, but... blessedly relieved. _Yes_, he thought, leaning in to deepen the kiss. _Thank you, goddess. She loves me in return_.

She smelled so good, like fresh rain and the gentle scent of the verta flower. Noel traced his thumb across the line of her jaw and the corner of his mouth tilted upwards when Serah made a small, appreciative sound. He followed the skin of her throat to her collarbone, where a small silver chain hung.

The engagement necklace.

Noel stumbled away, heat flushing his cheeks. "S-Serah," he gasped. His heart was hammering so loudly in his chest that he could hardly hear himself. "But... But what about Snow?"

Serah shook her head sharply. "Forget Snow!" She cried. Then her eyes widened, as if her own words had surprised her. "I... I did love Snow, but I don't. Not now."

"Why?"

Noel was reassured to see that Serah was also having some trouble. She took a few breaths before answering. "I love _you_, Noel."

He grinned. "I hoped you would say that."

Serah smiled in return. "So, would I be right in guessing that you, too-?"

"Yes," he said immediately. "Yes, in fact-" Noel paused and glanced at his right arm, where the cords of his Hunters' Knot crossed his muscle. He frowned at it for a moment and looked up at Serah. She was watching him curiously.

"What is it?"

"Serah, would you-" He stopped. "Maybe we should sit down."

They seated themselves on the sand, and Noel noticed for the first time the passage of time; the sun was nearly gone, and the sky was purple and blue with the coming night.

"Is it about the Hunters' Knot?" Serah asked. She was sitting to Noel's right, but angled her body so she was facing him. Her knees were pressing warmly against his.

"Yes." He held out his arm to her. "Yeul put this on me. Legend has it that whoever ties this knot on a Hunter's arm is bound to them."

"Bound?" She looked thoughtful. "You mean it's a promise of protection?"

"Yeah. But I've heard it said that it goes deeper than that; that the two people are linked together, and it stays that way until the Hunter takes off the Knot."

Serah's face lit up. "Hey!" She snapped her fingers. "Do you think that's part of the reason we keep seeing Yeul? Because she's drawn to you from the Knot?"

Noel nodded. "That's what I've been thinking." He looked down at his arm. He began to pull at the bow with his left hand.

Serah paled a little. "Noel..."

"I used to think that a world without Yeul was a world that I couldn't bear to live in," Noel said conversationally. He had succeeded with the ribbons and they pooled loosely around his wrist. He held out his arm to Serah. "I still feel that way, but about you."

A blush rose to her cheeks. "You're serious about this," she murmured. "I mean, you honestly... love me."

He responded by kissing her cheek.

Serah slowly re-tied the cord on his forearm, using their white shadows on his tan arms as her guide. After she knotted the bow at the top, Noel shook his head.

"No, tighter. I don't want it to fall down."

She smiled and made it tighter.

The sky was fully dark, and the stars were coming out in their scattered glory. In the weak light from the moon, the white sands glowed pale blue against the silent, black mountains. Noel and Serah stretched out side by side on the ground, watching the stars.

"Oh Cocoon, it was so hard to see the night sky," Serah told him quietly. "There were too many lights, too many people, too much going on. After the fall, when I spent my first night on Pulse, I saw the entire sky for the first time. It was the only thing that made me happy that day, when Lightning was gone."

"There are stories about the constellations I heard when I was a boy," Noel murmured. "After this... someday, I'll tell you."

"When the world is saved and the timeline is set right," Serah said contentedly. "We can watch the stars every night and you can tell me."

Noel smiled. He loved her view of the future. It was so beautiful and simple, and it made even this barren place seem perfect. He reached out and twined his fingers through hers.

Serah turned her head to look at him. "You're staring at me," she said, amusement and happiness in her voice. "I thought we were watching the stars."

"I'm memorizing you," Noel corrected softly. "I want to remember you exactly like this until the day I die."

Her lips curved upwards. "You almost sound like you expect us to be separated. Well, I don't." Her hand tightened in his. "I plan on watching you every night for the rest of my life."

From Serah, the words sounded like a promise. Noel knew that no matter what the future held for them, no matter how far they had to go to make things right, Serah's words would follow him, haunt him, comfort him.

She would lead him home.

To her.

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><p><strong>Thanks for reading! Everyone who reviews gets a hug. :)<strong>


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